18 March 2009

On a Lighter Note

I am drinking way too much coffee.  I can actually see my fingers tweaking out as I type.  I can actually feel a headache coming and I'm shifting gears.  It's time to actually study for this exam. 

What I do want is a break.  To sit back, relax and just chill. Is it weird to say that sometimes I just wanna chill at home? I don't feel like being the social butterfly all the time.  I just want a break.  Next quarter is going to roll around and I have 17 units. Then summer will hit and I'm still going to be in school down here.  There is no real break. I just keep going. It's like those Energizer Bunny commercials and I just happen to be that bunny.

Irvine Irvine Irvine. Eh, it's a chill school. Nice suburb community. Okay, so nice that everyone is either upper middle class or just filthy rich.  So wonderful that I'm bored.  That kinda nice.  But I know once I go back home I'm going to see a difference. That what I thought wasn't ghetto, and I mean my hometown, is turning ghetto.  So what happens after my 4 years down here?  I move out of state for graduate school hopefully.  I want to attend BU or BC. I'm not too picky.. Or just some college in Boston.  There, I'll have a job.  There, I'll be a grad student.  There I'll start something new again and hopefully I'll have that beagle I'm dreaming about.

Why do I want consistent change? Why do I always look for change?

Even in Irvine, I know I'll be leaving in a year or two to study abroad.  I want to, you know. I want to do the DC program and perhaps the study abroad program my third year.  Ugh, I don't know what I'm doing anymore.

Part of me just wants to drop college and become a bum on the streets.

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