Achoo!

I have the common cold, wonderful. I get the H1N1 vaccine and the next day I'm welcomed with the common freaking cold. More like the sniffles, really, but still. It bothers me. I keep scratching my nose and rubbing it so that it turns red. Yes, folks, I'm in the Christmas spirit by becoming Rudolph. Joy to the world. And another additional bonus is the fact that when I sneeze it's loud and high-pitched; trust me, it even annoys me.

Anyway, today I watched Avatar with Wesley and let me tell you right now, it was really good. The images were good, the story line was good, the fact that there was political messages made it bomb for me. Yet, some parts of the movie were completely unnecessary, in fact they dragged the movie a bit. It's kind of sad though. Because I'm overemotional (I like to say I'm empathetic) I wanted to cry during the sad, intense, and painful moments of the movie. But I told myself, "Michelle! You're an idiot. It's not real. No crying for a sci-fi movie. Nope nope nope!" Apparently the lady next to Wesley was crying up a storm. Funny white people.

Later on today, I went to dinner with friends... Hmm. Let's make that dinner with friends more like dinner with about thirty people. Yikes. The bill was ridiculous and let me tell you; stupid BJs. I hate you. I had little awkward moments as well, since I'm now not close with anyone really there. It's somewhat embarrassing. And eh. I could keep going but I fear ... Anyway.

But my highlight of my day was really being able to converse with Wesley about current situations that happen in her life and mine as well. It's nice that I have someone who can relate to the same problems I'm facing, or that she understands my situations instead of assuming I'm this way of that. I miss her. She kept me sane.

Mayonaise

Stinkiest crap ever made, but supposedly it can cure dead, dry hair and make it shinier and softer. Well, we'll wait and see shall we? My little sister Rachelle told me I stink and my friend Daryl had to say I probably smelled like a sandwich. Oh the joy of mayo, the fatty condiment. Hopefully it will work since my hair has been suffering from little ol' apathetic me.

I have been a hermit for awhile now. I go out every other day. Wait, is that still a hermit? I don't know. I just hate going out too often since well 1)I'm broke 2)My parents are still on my case about booze and drugs 3) I actually like being a bum. There I said it! I actually like doing nothing, since when school rolls around, it'll be kicking my butt. But since I'm somewhat in dreamworld, I haven't been able to think of what to write. I hate posting things about my day so often though; I'd rather post some random thought up. Gah. I'm becoming an empty mayo jar.

Number 3

So this is my third blog for today. Ha, man I'm obsessed with blogging it's disgusting. So I'm beginning to hate meat. It's the reason why my digestive system is slow. I'm seriously thinking about becoming vegetarian. Or detoxifying my body. I don't know. All I know is that I feel disgusting.

The Sound

What's the sound when you hear the scissors cutting across your hair? Does it make a Chuchin noise.. I'm trying to imitate it but I'm failing miserably by my lonesome. I need to cut my dying hair. I'm really happy though, that my hair is mostly jet-black by itself. The only bothersome thing are that the ends are brown still. I haven't dyed my hair since last December.. That's when I died it jet-black. HAIR CUT NOWWWW.

Fix Miss Robo

The robot was broken for some time now. Her gears made her emotional, but she is not suppose to have any feelings or emotions for others. She is suppose to be detached from everyone around her. She is suppose to be heartless. It will take time till she is fixed.

Looks like another sleepless night.

The Big Butterflies

For some reason, my mind begin to wander until I recalled what my grandma in the Philippines said to me. When there are giant butterflies, there is a spirit visiting or watching over you. Some other Filipinos say that even when the smallest butterflies are there, there are spirits as well, even if it's for a short time. I can't put my finger on why I recalled that but I thought I should jot it down before I absolutely forget.


Last night I had a nightmare. I dreamt of guns, chocolate, and houses. I can't control my dreams. I wish I could though. When I have nightmares, they're not the pathetic nightmares where you're in a haunted house or whatnot. They're always crazy, always extreme where I want to cry but no one can hear me scream. I usually wake up panting, wanting to curl up into a ball, and not sleep for a bit. One of my sisters, Janelle was shot in my dream several times. Like a solicitor, I was forced to go up to houses and ring door bells or my sister would be shot. For some odd reason, my sister held chocolate in her hand. Then, he would shoot her anyway, even if I went up to the doorstep. Before I woke up, he shot her anyway, enough to kill her. I don't remember much more than that. I remember the chocolate oozing out of the wrapper, caramel dripping and looking waxy. It was a sunny day too.


I hate ending with such a bad thought. Hmm. I was looking at World Market sales papers and stumbled upon a wine called "Cupcake." I really want to try their Chardonnay, Sauvignon Blanc, or perhaps their Petite Sirah.

The "Scare"

Ha, I almost thought I didn't pass some of my classes. I really need to learn how to control that temper of mine. Obviously, I'm hot-headed. I'm a short-fuse; once you irritate me, it's hard to calm me down. But it was scary thinking I almost failed. Poop. I could have done better... I really need to work on time-management.

I guess these past few days I have been reflecting on the past. Last night, I was talking to Daryl about old blogs that I rediscovered such as .. I forgot that I quit that old thing this year. I completely forgot that I replaced it with blogspot. I don't think I want to invest my time into tumblr though. I really like blogspot for some reason... I think it's because I began blogging more often on this thing, especially in the beginnings of my years in college. Anyway, as I was reviewing over my blogs, I have come to realize how stupid I was. No really- I was fucking stupid. The things I complained about, the people, the stupid high school drama, good grief.

Today, I was speaking to Jason T. about how we've known each other for... about seven years now. Well, I knew of him in 7th grade, so eight for me, but to Jason, well he didn't know me. No one really knew me until 8th grade. T_T It's weird to think that I've known people for that long when I haven't lived that long to begin with. And it's crazy; to think, soon, I'm going to be turning twenty. Honestly, when I'll be turning 30 I'll think that's it's stupid that I even wrote this blog. Damnit. It's just funny to think I won't be a "teen" anymore. No 7-Teen, 8-Teen, no 9-Teen. Just 20. Time seems to fly by.

Man, by 30 though I'll hopefully have settled down. -__-

Mellow Nights

I spent forty-five minutes in Build-A-Bear. Oh no, not for myself, but for my friends because they were building them. I did help name one though- Peter. Oh! And I got to help Jonaz pick the Hello Kitty Bear's outfit. She was fancy. And Peter was too. Ugh, I did damage at the mall too. I spent about $68 on this Puma jacket.. It was 30% off! You can't say "no" to a deal like that... I'm terrible!

What else besides shopping? Yliana made me realized how cold I've become. Yliana stated, "I really hope she does well..." But I've lost all hope for a particular person. It's somewhat pitiful, really. I mean, I felt bad that a skunk was almost run over, but I can't pity my friend. I believe it's because I've come to accept that she's fickle-minded. She has no idea what she's doing and she's going to be like this for awhile. So I'm not gonna say anything anymore. I can't even hope for the best for her. I think I'm just at the level of "whatever" with her. That's that.

Étrange!

I don't know if what I'm doing is considered "normal" anymore. Frankly, I don't care. But then I begin to overanalyze. Wonder. Am I being too much if the other reciprocates? Or am I being selfish, having the desire to have attention and know that it could be for someone else?

What happened to robotic, unfeeling, Michelle?

Oh, and today I am going to try to begin reading. It's time I fed my brain some good ol' literature. For some reason in school we never read The Tales of Huckleberry Fin. Yeah, my high school sucked.

One Glass Please

I believed that it was always someone else's fault for any stupid behavior I did. How stupid, how foolish was I. I would inevitably blame another individual because it was simply easier. Now I see it clearly. All this time the only one to blame is myself, the fool. I imagine the angels or demons laughing at me. I incessantly do this; I turn off what's left of my heart and think logically. I imagine too far ahead and overanalyze what's placed in my lap. One day I'm going to become a robot. I'm going to be able to turn on and off my feelings or emotions for another since I do this all the time. What a fool.